what do you do when you have lost inspiration
for something you were so excited to do?
today while i was in my painting class
i got stuck.
i lost all direction in what i wanted to originally paint.
i have been a perfectionist since i was born.
i have prided myself on creating beautiful pieces of art
that the majority like.
that part of my personality came to the forefront today.
i told myself that i was not happy with my painting
because it was not visually beautiful.
but that wasn’t what this painting was about!
it is so hard to leave that part of myself out of my art.
so after some time just staring at it,
i got the idea to use a squeegee.
i pretty much slathered paint on and started covering up my work.
i’m now hoping that creating
a lot of layers with the squeegee
will produce something beautiful,
but still true to my original message.
today was not a therapeutic day of painting like i wished every day to be.
but now i know that is impossible.